Ogden, I'm Breaking Up With You...

This one time Brody and I decided to wear big boy and girl panties and buy a house. While Brody made good decisions and wanted to live in a nice suburban area, maybe in a cul-de-sac close to Targets and Starbucks, Arielle made bad decisions and said, "let's give Ogden a try!"

See, Arielle used to work in Ogden before they moved there. Arielle worked in inner city Ogden. And although it had its share of drug deals, pushy panhandlers and drive by shootings, Arielle knew that the city was buckling down on its clean up efforts. She knew the city had some quirks but it boasted great local shops, city art and wonderful community activities. They were just 3 blocks away from historic 25th street with amazing bars, restaurants and boutiques! Brody was not convinced. Because Brody had a fucking brain. But Arielle can nag her way into anything so there they were, living in downtown Ogden.

Even after a homeless guy tried to break in their house after a month she still hoped for the best. Even after someone put FUCKING SAND in her gas tank, she still saw the good side of Ogden, even when someone stole their propane tank to their grill, Arielle defended her city of residence.

But now Arielle is done.

And I'm done talking in third person because it's weird. 

So apparently our neighbors can't afford a lawn mower and mow down the wild savanna that is their lawn, or buy actual curtains rather than using WinCO bags on their windows. But they can buy enough fireworks to do a decent firework show every night...since June 28th. Oh and they can't pick up the trash from said firework that lays in the road either. While they are enjoying their little fireworks spectacular, it's fucking Monday night for those who are employed and we have JOBS that we have to WAKE UP for in THREE FUCKING HOURS. I saw the same neighbors trying to buy beer on WIC. A bag of peas has a higher i.q than these folks. 

And tonight, it's now past 10 on Wednesday and our street sounds like a Petey Pablo concert. 

Maybe I'm acting to much of a Clint Eastwood in his "get off my lawn" days but seriously? Wednesday? I know it's summer. But that doesn't mean that people don't work. 

The new LDS temple opens this weekend, 7 blocks away from our house. And Ogden city has been in full swing trying to clean the surrounding area up. New banners and newly painted sculptures line the streets. They have ambassadors volunteering to help tourists find restaurants. It's supposed to bring in a ton of tourism. And yet I feel jipped.

Does it really have to take a new temple to clean up our city? What it feels like is Ogden City is shoving all of the "inner city" clutter into the hall closet and under the bed and buying a new tablecloth to impress the out of town relatives. Yeah that's great that between 22nd and 25th and Wall and Washington are getting a face lift, but what about the rest of your city? What about the nasty ass needles I find on the sidewalk that I have to hope my dog didn't step on when I take her for walks? What about the stores on Lincoln on 26th that have bullet holes in the windows? What about the fact every night Brody and I lay awake playing Gunshot or Firework? 

 I tried taking a chance on living in Ogden. I love the farmers market and the Friday Art Strolls. I love what the owners of Alleged have done for our city. But I am annoyed. I am annoyed that every morning I spend 20 minutes putting my trash back into my trash can because someone has thrown it across our lawn looking for cans. I am annoyed that I can't go to sleep until 3 am on a Tuesday because there is no common decency. 

Now that I'm getting closer to paying off my debt (that's what I'm telling myself...ahem..). We will start putting in new counter tops and flooring, we will finish the re-painting, And we will sell our home. Which makes me sad, because I LOVE this house. I LOVE my home. It truly is my favorite place. And we will look for some place to live where I feel safe walking my dog by myself and where we know our stuff won't get stolen. And that makes me sad too, because I had high hopes for Ogden. 

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go to bed because it's 10:30, which means I get to lay in bed and listen to the soothing sounds of my neighbor rev his motorcycle for 45 minutes while the people across the street listen to the Insane Clown Posse's Greatest Hits. 

I Was Grown Up Today...It Wasn't Too Horrible..

There is this pit that lives in a part of my brain. Whenever I feel like being productive, my little productive brain cells start running like wee little marathon runners, but then they reach the pit. 10% of the time they can jump over the pit like Tom Cruise in a Mission Impossible movie, however, 90% of the time their little legs are too wee to jump over the pit and in they go. Inside the pit lives infinite Netflix and used book sales at Hastings (ps: Hastings is my new favorite place, I haven't been there since 1998 and I don't know why..). 

Today I decided that my productive brain cells were going to take a running leap and end up on the other side of the pit. At first, I just wanted to clean my bathroom sink. Mostly because it had about 3 months of toothpaste spots on the counter and that was only the part of the counter that I could see. The rest of it was covered under cotton balls and eye makeup remover pads. Gross. As I was cleaning I remembered that we still had 2 boxes that we still hadn't unpacked in our bathroom. So I went through the boxes and ended up tossing most of the content. If we hadn't needed anything out of them for the last 10 months I think we could do without them. I found some baskets and dressed them up with some ribbons. It only took me about 20 minutes, which makes me wonder why I dread it so much. 

I wish I had a before picture to show you how horrible this counter looked, however it was a little embarrassing. The fact I can see my counter and my mirror isn't so dirty, is pretty awesome. 

Half way through my organization frenzy, I was looking at the shelving unit in our bathroom. The previous owners left it, I think it was supposed to be for towels, however, we never have folded towels in this house (just being real..) I thought that the shelf would be great in our living room to hold all of the newly acquired books I got from my mom...and Hastings...cough...cough. I cleaned it off and hauled it (read: Brody hauled it) down the stairs. I added some decorative touches to make it look more grown up. I am pretty happy about the outcome. I'm just glad our living room looks more like a cozy living room and less like a frat house where the dudes can't afford furniture. 

I love that I had been searching for a cheap bookcase and found everything I need in my house. And I love that it is getting filled with books. This particular shelf makes me oh so happy:

It's full of happiness aka Jen Lancaster, Candace Bushnell and Lauren Conrad books. OH MY! PS: if you have never heard of Jen Lancaster and you want to read a book that will make you laugh so hard that your abs get a work out, go pick up one of her books. NOW. Also Bitter is The New Black has helped me so much over the last few months. Whenever I feel like I can't get ahead of this debt thing, I just read it and I feel so much hope.

And you know, even though I have grown up furniture and grown up capabilities like organizing, I still have to throw in a bit of Disney...

And one last thing: I might not be posting as often. I am working on a new project, I'm writing a book! YAY! Nothing has come of it yet, and probably won't for a while. I am constantly writing and re-writing and then re-writing some more. And then after that, I re-write some more. I love writing so I have had so much fun doing it. I'll still be posting here for sure. You'll still see some fun Disney posts as well! Thanks for all the support!

Minutes Well Spent

When you think life is hard, something usually happens to put it perspective. It's something that makes you think, "You, know, life really doesn't suck." 

I got a swift kick in the ass tonight and it made me realize how much I need to change. I need to be a better friend, partner, sister and daughter. I need to stop being unreliable and flaky. I have to stop worrying about stupid shit like money and focus on creating memories and experiences with my friends and family. You know, I have friends on social media, that I never talked to in real life? We went to Jr. High and High School together and never said a word and yet I'm a placeholder on their virtual friend's list. But if we ever saw each other in a public place, we wouldn't even speak to each other. And yet, I care so much about what they think of me. I worry about what they think about my job, my car, my house, the fact that I don't have kids or I'm not married. And why? Why do I care? I spend more time dwelling on what these people think of me rather than surrounding myself with the people who actually care about me. 

It's time to stop worrying about getting my 9 hours of sleep and rushing home so I can watch 5 hours of Netflix in my sweats. Now is the time to stop by an old friend's house after work and talk about everything and nothing. Now is the time to stay up way past my bedtime laughing under the stars with family. Now is the time to stop worrying about tomorrow, and start soaking up the moments of today. 

We don't know how many days we get. When it's our time, we don't even get the option to accept or deny it. We just go. And I have this faith that while our physical body is just a vessel for our soul, and our soul can continue to live on. But damn it's good to see a physical body and physically hear the voices of our loved ones, and not just hear their voices in our hearts.  I can feel my grandmother all the time. I can even smell her sometimes. But I still would rather see her with my eyes and be able to hug her rather than talk to the walls and hope that she hears me. My point is, we make plans to spend time with our loved ones, but we never actually spend the time. And when they are gone all we can do is say, "I should have.." "Maybe if I...". But maybe if we stopped worrying about the bills and having a "Pinterest worthy" house and started spending those wasted moments with those we loved, those thoughts wouldn't be as prominent. 

So now what do I do. I can sit on my bed and cry like I have for the last few hours. Or I can change. I can be there for my friends and family like they need me to be. I can start appreciate every breathe I take. And start living in the moment. I look at my 24 years of life, and although I don't feel like they have been completely wasted, I can definitely start making the next 24 years count even more. It's time to stop doing things I hate, and start doing more of the things I love. I'm going to surrender to the things I can't control, and stop wasting precious seconds and minutes worrying about them. 

So tomorrow, instead of completing my living room painting project, I'm going to see an old friend, and then I'm going to see my mama. I'm going to sit on my porch and write instead of watch 4 hours of Army Wives episodes. The minutes start counting now. Because when my minutes are gone, I want to know they have been well spent. 

The Tank Is Empty...

You guys are probably very confused...usually today is DMOTW but I thought today I'd take a break and write about something else....or try to.

So I do a lot of writing for my job. Which is amazing. I love my job and I'm super grateful for it. But I feel like it's taking away from my writing here. Now it's not like I can just quit my job and stay home and work on this blog. I have waaaay to many bills to pay and this blog is too new to make me any profit. It's definitely something I want in the future but just something I can't do right now. 

I have 3 months of topics written out at a time. I try to have enough posts scheduled ahead of time so I'm not scrambling for content...like I am now...I try to have at least 5 posts scheduled out. I usually wake up early to write, but most of the time I am way too brain dead to crank out a post. After work I try to go run and then I come home and 1.) I spent all day writing for other people and my creativity is all used up or 2.) I'm still dying from my run and I lay on my living room floor until I have enough energy to crawl up the stairs to go to bed. 

I was offered a few guest blogging features and was super excited about them, I talked to the bloggers about how my creativity tank was empty and now wasn't the best time. It totally sucked because I really wanted to do it, but everyone was super supportive and understood and said the spot is always open when I'm ready. But I still feel like I'm missing out on an opportunity because I am putting more work into another person's project than my own.  

Am I going about creativity all wrong? Is it like a gas tank that can be emptied and refilled? Or am I not actually a creative person because creative people always have enough of it? I have been spending a lot of time in thought, thinking about creativity, where to find it in the external world and in ourselves. And I found some great quotes that I want to share.

 I love this quote. I think that it means that I've stepped away from the little Arielle who has been my inner voice for a long time. I have always taken pride in knowing that I was still very much in tune with her. But she's been lost among the chaos of money, careers, mortgages and student loan payments. I think we are long overdue for a visit with each other. 

I have learned that inspiration will not come to me by sitting on my ass. I need to be out in the world, looking at art, tasting great food, having amazing conversations with people. I need to step out of my comfort zone and try new things. 

I love love love this infographic!! It is my favorite thing!! I'm definitely going to be looking at this a lot!!

What inspires you? How do you keep your creative edge? Let me know in the comments! And don't forget my giveaway is ending soon!! Have you entered yet?

Weekend Recap

Disclaimer: I've been super lazy lately. This happened LAST weekend...not this weekend...ahem...


How was everyone's weekend? We had a busy one, but it was a blast! Here's a recap of everything that happened..and a lot of pictures...sorry...

Saturday: 

We started off our weekend at the Air Show with my mom and my nephew Cam. It was pretty warm and crowded but I just pretended like we were in Disneyland haha! Hill Air Force Base did an awesome job! 

Look how huge this plane is!!! It's insane!!

We were able to see the new F-22's, which were pretty cool. Brody had a ton of fun. Anything that flies is his thing. It was awesome to see how excited he was. 

Everyone take note at how hot he looks in aviators...ok carry on...

 

The Thunderbirds performed and totally blew everyone away! They were absolutely amazing! Plus there's a woman pilot in the Thunderbirds, which is totally badass...If you ever get the chance to watch the Thunderbirds I highly recommend it! Their teamwork is amazing and they are all extremely good at what they do.

Sunday:

Sunday we went over to my mom's for a BBQ and swimming. Brody and I were pretty sunburnt from the airshow the day before so we didn't want to swim too much. I just put my feet in the pool. But it was nice to relax and enjoy some more family time. 

 

 We had a ton of fun with my sister, her fiancee, my mom and my nephew!